


tell rock and roll i'm alone again

by youretoolate999



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Eating Disorders, Self Harm, first story here wowie, lmao idek, the title and some quotes are from the fob song alpha dog and omegalomaniac yeye, trigger warning, uhhh please give me criticism and tell me if this is shit or nah
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-20
Updated: 2017-09-21
Packaged: 2019-01-01 00:37:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12144717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youretoolate999/pseuds/youretoolate999
Summary: “welcome to the new deja vu,” josh muttered as he lightly traced the scars on tyler’s arms.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> been a lurker for a while but please tell me if this is trash or not heh  
> any advice or criticism is extremely welcome  
> all due respect to jenna and ty´s relationship and josh and ty´s relationship, be it friends or anything else it´s their life  
> if i should actually do more comment pls  
> anywho imma blast hope this is aight

he gripped the other boy’s damaged wrist; a familiar sight he wished would stop coming back to haunt him.

“josh, what is this?”

there was silence as a self-deprecating smile stretched oddly on the blue-haired boy’s tired face. his eyes shone with masochistic excitement, and only a hint of remorse.

“josh. answer me. this isn’t good for either of us.”

josh’s eyes started to glaze a bit with tears, and bit his lip to hold them back. he finally decided to speak.

“‘m fine, ty. if it’s bad for you then just leave. no reason to stay,” his voice cracking slightly at the end.

the taller boy scoffed, shaking his head. typical. always trying his best to be the bad boy with no feelings, but tyler could see right through the tough exterior.

“yeah, right. i’d say that i’ll never leave you, and it would definitely be a lie,” he sarcastically patronized.

“never means forever.”

no no no, now was not the time. whenever josh didn’t want to talk, he’d just spout lyrics and ignore tyler’s concern with a dismissive air and then stop talking. it pissed him off to no end.

josh just smiled slightly as he saw tyler’s expression turn annoyed.

“welcome to the new deja vu,” josh muttered as he lightly traced the scars on tyler’s arms.

now he was trying to take the attention off of himself by bringing up the other boy’s past struggles. yeah, it was a dick move, but he didn’t have any other ideas. it’s like in pokemon. josh, use last resort!

“stop.”

the attack failed. shit. well, time to clam up again.

“hey. don’t do this to me, dun. it doesn’t work on me. you should that by now. come on, get up.”

tyler pulled the shorter boy to the bathroom, grabbing rubbing alcohol and gauze from the medicine cabinet behind the mirror. josh tugged his hand away from tyler at the sound of the name.

“dammit, josh, i know you don’t like your last name, but you’re gonna deal with it right now. you know why.”

he put the boy’s wrist under the faucet and ran cool water over the abrasions and few near lacerations. josh hissed as the water hit his arm. it stung, the sink turned red with blood.

“shh, you’re alright,” he pressed a kiss to the smaller’s forehead.


	2. but you're possibly the prettiest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lmao idk what im doing with this but uh yeah  
> comment if i should revise and continue this  
> or if i shouldnt  
> im lonely hit me up

josh was tired. oh-so-fucking tired. yeah, he knew he was a piece of shit who was somehow lucky enough to have someone like t y l e r j o s e p h love him, but they’d been best friends for a while. well, more than that, but whatever. close enough. nothing was official, but it was pretty obvious they were both unopposed to being much more than friends, as they showed that.

josh had an addictive personality, quickly latching onto things and obsessing over them to consume his time and make him feel like he was smart or something. he didn’t know why, but it helped, so fuck off. he’s kidding, please don’t leave. not like he’d say that out loud. that’s why tyler was there. one of the many reasons, to be exact (yet more vague?). 

anywho, josh had somehow got tyler joseph in his life. an amazing person, as poetic as ryan ross himself, and the sweetest dude he’d ever met. ever will meet, probably. but this is off track. didn’t mean to get lost in the backstory, josh doesn’t really wanna talk about his past. but history will always be recorded, will it not? for better or for worse.

but josh being tired and feeling like trash and just wanting to not feel numb was not a good thing, especially when tyler has to stay late at work. josh feels bad that tyler has to pretty much take care of him, but what could he do?

instead of waiting for tyler to get home, he decided to bust out a razor blade and a bottle of vodka. tyler would be too tired from work to want to hear about his feelings anyway, and josh was tired of being a burden. this was the least he could do, he thought.

so he sat on the toilet, lid down, and grimaced at the way his thighs looked when they spread slightly on the cheap porcelain. he had already rinsed the blade with rubbing alcohol, so he was being careful, thank you very much. controlled demolition. sort of. he took huge gulps of the vodka, then washed the disgusting flavor out with water from the sink next to him.

the blade sliced gracefully through his pale skin, already littered with healed scars. He sighed happily as he noticed he’d hit styro, the beautiful purgatory above the fat layer but below the epidermis. it would leave a huge scar once it healed, but right now that didn’t matter.

he’d always wanted to cover his arms in cuts, and he decided he’d give into that urge. his veins used to freak him out, but now they did quite the opposite. the thin skin of his wrists sliced easily, and he quickly marked them up, smiling as the deeper ones quickly filled with blood.

he heard a key in the locked front door jiggling, but he was too far gone to panic like he used to.

tossing the blade on the floor next to the toilet and setting the bottle next to it, he pulled a black hoodie on quickly as tyler entered their apartment.

”hey, j, what’s up?”

one sniff and he could smell the liquor on josh's breath, the man already a bit tipsy. tyler fucked up.

**Author's Note:**

> lmaoooooooo uhhhhm,,,, this is creative writing dont flag me school admin thanks ~(o3o)~


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